Discipline (Family Meetings) – Two years ago, I interviewed a Positive Discipline writer as part of research for a parenting workshop at school. We were stuck in a cycle of shouting, making threats, and constant nagging when it came to discipline, which proved to be counterproductive and drained everyone in the household. “Do you conduct family gatherings?” she inquired.
It’s not as if we are facing an emergency situation that necessitates an immediate meeting. I explained that we usually engage in conversations during dinner or while commuting to school.
A family gathering serves as an excellent opportunity to address underlying issues, especially when all family members reside together in the same household.
Various family members exert their influence in distinct ways. A family meeting enables each member to assert their influence constructively and respectfully.
Guidelines for organizing family meetings
1. Develop a Strategic Plan
Choose a day that suits everyone’s schedule for a weekly half-hour meeting. Once the day and time are set, it is crucial to stick to this schedule consistently.
Establishing a specific meeting day and time helps children recognize the importance of these gatherings for the family. Changing the meeting schedule diminishes its significance and reduces the likelihood of it becoming a regular practice.
2. Encourage Involvement from All Parties Interested
Our initial meeting involved my four-year-old, an ideal age to commence as younger children are naturally curious about their surroundings.
We agreed as a family that involving children under four is beneficial. Despite my initial doubts, we even placed bets on how long each child would actively participate in the meeting.
As we sat in the living room, our phones remained silent, and text messages unattended. To our surprise, once the kids realized they had our undivided attention, the meeting extended as long as an episode of Batman.
3. Determine Optimal Approaches
Structure the family meeting like a sandwich. Begin by having each family member express something positive about the others.
Initially, this may seem trivial, but over time, you will anticipate hearing each person’s kind words. Once everyone is in good spirits, transition to addressing more challenging situations that require collaborative problem-solving between you and your children.
Integrate topics related to household routines and meal planning into the discussion. Conclude with a fun activity like playing tag or going out for ice cream, or perhaps both.
Establishing consistent traditions can help streamline the meeting process.