Parenting an adolescent can be challenging. It’s the phase where they start to assert their independence and cultivate distinct, individual personalities. Rationality and logic become paramount, and their preferences, aversions, and desires intensify. For parents, this period can feel overwhelming as the once-compliant child transforms into a person with their own viewpoints and beliefs.
Navigating this delicate phase can be daunting, but wisdom suggests that practicing mindfulness can significantly aid in parenting your teenager.
As we enter 2024, Smita Bansal, an actress and influential mom, who imparts her wisdom on nurturing teenage daughters on coto, a female-led social community platform, shares valuable insights that helped her connect with her teenage daughters. These insights may assist you in maneuvering through this demanding yet rewarding stage in your lives:
1. Establish Trust: Adolescents crave validation for their emotions and a listening ear. Offer them a secure environment to express themselves. Listen attentively without interruption and ensure that their conversations with you remain confidential if they opt not to share their feelings with others.
2. Invest Time in Them, Especially After School: Teenagers may become more withdrawn and distant as they mature. Hence, make an effort to spend quality time with them. If you have the flexibility to work from home or are a stay-at-home parent, dedicate an hour or two post-school to discuss their day. This practice can help you detect any potential concerns in their lives, such as bullying or heartbreaks.
Engage in open dialogues with them to encourage trust and openness. If you work outside the home, establish an evening or nightly routine for enjoyable activities like playing games or watching movies together. Utilize this time to share experiences from your own teenage years, illustrating that you, too, are human and have encountered similar situations.
3. Embark on Trips Together: Traveling fosters stronger bonds and may help them view you more as a friend or confidante rather than just a parent. Whenever feasible, plan trips that encompass both your interests—whether it’s hiking, exploring historical sites, or visiting temples. This not only ensures enjoyment but also teaches them adaptability and flexibility.
4. Prioritize Substance Over Superficial Matters: While it’s natural for parents to get caught up in concerns like hairstyles and clothing choices, these might be avenues for your teen to express themselves. Ultimately, their character and abilities hold greater importance. Offer guidance on self-presentation considering certain dress codes, but concentrate your efforts on nurturing their essential qualities that will benefit them in life.
5. Maintain Firmness with Compassion: While instructing younger children may be straightforward, teenagers often exhibit rebellious behavior. It’s crucial to discern when to stand your ground and when to be lenient. Whether it’s their academic choices or experimenting with alcohol, establish clear boundaries early on. If they deviate, provide explanations and rationale instead of reprimands. This approach sustains their trust in you without diminishing over time.