Sometimes, as a spouse and parent, I have experienced the strong urge to manage all responsibilities and attend to everyone’s needs. However, what happens when this burden becomes too heavy to bear? Is there any merit in persisting with the facade of having everything under control?
This sentiment of being overwhelmed is not unique to me. Many individuals, including acclaimed Disney vocalists, can relate to this struggle. In a recent episode of the All In podcast, voice artist and singer Adassa shared a poignant anecdote about family and vulnerability that deeply resonated with me.
In 2020, following her family’s battle with COVID-19, Adassa faced a perplexing ordeal where she was suddenly paralyzed from the neck down. Recalling that harrowing period, she expressed, “I believed I was nearing death. I even went as far as drafting my will. … There were moments when I would gradually regain some mobility, only to lose it again. The simple act of walking a few steps would exhaust me, leading to a collapse. I remember a particularly frightening incident when I almost drowned in the bathtub due to numbness in my limbs, rendering me unable to call for help.”
Despite the challenges, Adassa highlighted that her forced reliance on her family members instilled in her a profound sense of trust. She candidly communicated her vulnerabilities to even her youngest children, requesting their assistance and support by admitting, “I truly need your help and strength because Mommy is struggling right now.” This act of vulnerability and openness with her children, she revealed, has not only made her a better parent but has also reinforced the family bond. She emphasized, “While we often dread revealing our weaknesses, it is in those moments that we discover our true strength.”
Amidst a series of medical examinations, efforts to regain mobility, and personal growth as a mother, Adassa’s family received a life-changing phone call. It was an offer for her to voice the character of Dolores Madrigal in the upcoming Disney movie Encanto, featuring original music by the renowned Lin-Manuel Miranda. Despite her ongoing illness, Adassa instructed her husband, Gabe, saying, “Even if I’m no longer alive, you have my permission to decline the offer. I am seizing this opportunity.”
The subsequent chapters of Adassa’s journey have been nothing short of remarkable, with Encanto swiftly becoming a beloved Disney classic. Her rendition of the chart-topping song “We Don’t Talk About Bruno” garnered critical acclaim, propelling her into the spotlight. Post-Encanto, she collaborated with the Tabernacle Choir during their successful world tour in Mexico City and released a heartfelt album titled In Jesus We Are One, which she describes as an expression of gratitude.
One of the most profound lessons from Adassa’s narrative is her realization of the invaluable earthly blessings that stem from having an eternal family. She observed, “Children possess a resilience and strength beyond our imagination. At times, my desire to control and manage every aspect stems from a need for perfection. Yet, I have witnessed their inner fortitude, their capacity to endure and grow stronger. We, as a family, can weather any storm together. If our ultimate goal is to be united eternally, there will be moments that demand collective humility, strength, love, and compassion—not just from individuals but from the entire family unit. I am genuinely grateful for every experience, even the most challenging ones, as they have accelerated my personal growth in ways I never thought possible.”
The next time I find myself juggling multiple roles or concealing my struggles from my son, overwhelmed by the weight of responsibilities, I aspire to allow him to express his innate compassion and care in his endearing toddler manner. I aim to grow alongside him, fostering personal resilience and familial strength, rather than forging ahead or lagging behind.
For the full interview with Adassa on All In, you can tune in using the player below.