Expert Parenting Advice from Therapist Drew Barrymore

January 28, 2024

If you’re seeking transformative parenting advice, Drew Barrymore offers valuable insights gleaned from a parenting book. Parenting entails navigating the realm of children’s intense emotions, presenting a challenge in discerning when to intervene and effectively managing one’s emotional responses to their children’s outbursts.

According to TODAY, Barrymore hosted Aliza Pressman, a psychologist, parenting expert, and author of “The Five Principles of Parenting,” on her show on Jan. 23. Barrymore expressed profound appreciation for Pressman, highlighting how a specific tip from the book significantly altered her approach to parenting.

Our innate parental instinct often drives us to swiftly alleviate our children’s distress. Barrymore recounted a phase from years ago when her daughter Olive would become deeply upset, prompting Barrymore to immediately rush to her aid. However, Olive’s reactions varied from evading Barrymore to displaying resistance. Barrymore found this perplexing.

Through Pressman’s guidance, Barrymore realized that her impulsive efforts to soothe Olive’s intense emotions were counterproductive. She acknowledged that neither extreme—chasing after Olive nor attempting to resolve the situation immediately—yielded positive outcomes. Pressman’s advice emphasized the importance of self-regulation, prompting Barrymore to step back when emotions ran high, allowing her daughter space to process while she composed herself before addressing the situation. This shift in approach led to the most favorable results Barrymore had experienced in parenting, a strategy she had not previously considered.

Acknowledging the common fear of confronting intense emotions, Aliza remarked on the tendency to instinctively seek solutions. Barrymore concurred, illustrating how she had been metaphorically chasing after her daughter’s emotions. Aliza emphasized the significance of managing emotions, likening it to preparing for varying weather conditions rather than attempting to control them. Teaching children to navigate their emotions equips them with resilience, fostering a sense of stability amid emotional turbulence.

Drawing a parallel to the airplane safety protocol of securing one’s mask before assisting others, the same principle applies to parenting. Prioritizing emotional grounding enables parents to support their children in processing feelings without immediately fixing every discomfort. While the inclination to shield children from discomfort is natural, embracing the learning opportunities arising from managing emotions is vital for both parents and children when confronting significant emotional challenges and disappointments.

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