When preparing for a teaching position at an international school in Asia, I delved into Amy Chua’s renowned book on tiger parenting, “Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother,” after reading about it in The New York Times. The article highlighted the notion of “Chinese mothers are superior,” prompting my interest in understanding the Asian parental landscape I would soon encounter.
Upon exploring the book, I initially viewed tiger parents as an anomaly rather than the norm. These parents, synonymous with harboring lofty ambitions for their children, incessantly drive their kids towards achieving top-notch test scores and meticulously plan Oxbridge applications as early as five or six years old. Their emphasis on academic, musical, and athletic accomplishments overshadows socializing and leisure activities. Striving for nothing less than perfection, they often pose challenges for schools due to their persistent involvement in their child’s education.
Having previously worked in primary schools in Somerset and northern England where parental involvement in education was more hands-off, I observed a stark contrast in parenting styles. British parents, in my experience, leaned more towards being kittens rather than tigers. Initially skeptical of the tiger parenting approach, I shared common concerns about its extremity. I feared that children encouraged to prioritize work above all else might miss out on essential aspects of early childhood development, hindering their playtime and potentially leading to repercussions later in life. The rigid teaching methods seemed to neglect fostering creativity and problem-solving skills.
However, upon commencing my new role, I soon realized that the tiger parenting approach was prevalent, particularly within the school I was part of. This firsthand experience exposed me to the clash between Western and Asian child-rearing and educational philosophies.
Gradually, I adapted some tiger parenting techniques in my teaching approach, witnessing the positive outcomes firsthand. Despite the academic successes associated with tiger parenting, there are evident drawbacks, including heightened stress levels among students, potential self-harm risks, and deficiencies in social skills due to limited peer interactions.
During my nine-year tenure in Asia, I observed that children raised by tiger parents not only achieved commendable academic results but also exhibited strong engagement in school activities and broader pursuits. They displayed high self-esteem and took pride in their academic and holistic achievements. Subsequently, I began incorporating certain tiger parenting strategies into my teaching methodology.
Upon returning to the UK, I recognized the pivotal role parental involvement and aspirations play in a child’s success, particularly in advocating for their children. In a time where school attendance rates are dwindling, I witnessed firsthand the efficacy of the Tiger approach in enhancing children’s academic performance.
While I don’t endorse a complete adoption of the tiger parenting stance, based on my interactions with diverse international families and witnessing their children’s progress and achievements, I recommend embracing certain tiger parenting principles:
Demonstrating Respect for Education
Encouraging a positive attitude towards education from a young age lays a crucial foundation for children’s academic journey. While it’s not necessary to adore every aspect of the educational system, fostering a constructive dialogue about school at home can significantly impact a child’s perception of learning.
Emphasizing Attendance
Consistent school attendance correlates strongly with academic performance. Missing school days can impede a child’s progress by depriving them of essential learning opportunities. Schools can effectively support students only when they are present in the classroom.
Parental Engagement and Communication with Teachers
Active parental involvement in school affairs, such as attending workshops, parent-teacher meetings, and engaging with teachers, can provide valuable insights into a child’s learning process. Collaborating with educators demonstrates the significance of education to both the child and the family.
Encouraging Reading Habits
Regularly reading to children from a young age and fostering a culture of reading at home can significantly enhance their literacy skills and academic outcomes. Engaging children in reading activities early on can have a lasting positive impact on their educational journey.
Promoting Music and Sports Participation
Involvement in music and sports not only instills discipline and commitment but also cultivates valuable life skills. Encouraging children to persevere in these activities can foster character development and teamwork abilities, contributing to their overall growth.
Managing Technology Usage
Setting boundaries on technology consumption, both for children and adults, is essential in promoting a balanced lifestyle. Limiting screen time and encouraging alternative activities can aid in developing various aspects of a child’s life beyond digital interfaces.
Valuing Cultural Experiences
Exposing children to diverse cultural activities and experiences can broaden their worldview and enhance their learning experiences. Engaging in extracurricular pursuits outside the academic realm can enrich a child’s understanding of the world around them.
Seeking Additional Support
In cases where children require extra academic assistance, considering tutoring services can provide valuable reinforcement and support. Supplementing classroom learning with personalized tutoring can boost a child’s confidence and academic performance in specific subjects.
By incorporating these principles into parenting and educational practices, individuals can strike a balance between nurturing academic excellence and holistic growth in children, drawing inspiration from the positive aspects of tiger parenting while tailoring them to suit individual needs and circumstances.