It has finally come to pass. I find myself in the role of parenting a screenager. It’s funny how karma works its magic.
Over the years, I have shared insights with parents on fostering better relationships with the teenagers under their roof. Drawing from my extensive experience working with adolescents in both educational settings and my clinical practice, I have developed practical strategies to navigate the turbulent waters of adolescence.
The period between 13 and 17 years old presents unique challenges. The adolescent brain is still maturing, leading to issues like poor impulse control and a tendency towards risk-taking behavior, which can often leave parents scratching their heads in bewilderment (“How could you make such a foolish decision?”).
I often emphasized that adolescence is a time for redefining togetherness. That same beloved child who once idolized you as a giant in their life is still present. While they may not lean on you as before and might even push back, the essence of your relationship will evolve, requiring a different kind of togetherness during these formative teenage years.
I cautioned parents against trying to be their child’s best friend, as a best friend doesn’t set curfews, dictate meals, or enforce rules about coming home. Establishing clear boundaries and maintaining a supportive parental role is crucial to maintaining harmony within the family.
Now, as I find myself in the shoes of such a parent, I am curious to see how these theories hold up while living with a screenager.
Recently, I witnessed my child marking her entry into the teenage years with a lively gathering of around 60 other enthusiastic teens. The scene was a vibrant display of youthful exuberance—fake tans, dresses hugging like belts, oversized eyelashes, and exuberant cheers greeting every newcomer. It was a sight to behold, observing these youngsters engage in the intricate dance of social interaction.
A particularly amusing moment arose when the song “Murder on the Dance Floor” blared through the speakers, prompting some of the girls to break into the worm dance move. It was a mix of amusement and slight embarrassment, wanting to shield them from their own exuberance.
Amidst the revelry, smartphones were wielded to capture moments for platforms like Snapchat and TikTok. Yet, beyond the digital facades, these teens were truly present, bonding and expressing gratitude for the enjoyable evening as they bid their farewells.
Despite the prevalent negative stereotypes about teenagers being self-absorbed and glued to their devices, these adolescents are no different from their predecessors—navigating insecurities, anxieties, and the quest for self-discovery.
The journey of growing up is fraught with uncertainties and the profound impact of external influences. It’s a challenging period for young adults, and we must acknowledge and empathize with their struggles.
This generation faces the added complexity of early exposure to adult themes through technology, leading to potential isolation and emotional distress. The repercussions of exclusion can be profound, leaving lasting scars on the psyche.
As a society, we must empower teenagers, especially young girls, to comprehend the repercussions of exclusion and cultivate empathy to prevent such harmful behaviors. By fostering understanding and compassion, we can mitigate the tendency towards exclusion and its detrimental effects on individuals.
Teenagers, regardless of the era, will grapple with similar trials and tribulations. While the external landscape may evolve, the core challenges of adolescence remain constant—a timeless journey of self-discovery and growth.
In conclusion, as I embark on this journey of parenting a screenager, I will keep you updated on the unfolding chapters. Your thoughts and prayers are appreciated.