From the initial haircut to the first birthday and the inaugural day at school, parents have traditionally reveled in commemorating their children’s significant milestones. However, contemporary young parents are taking it a step further by embracing the celebration of even the minutest moments.
In addition to the major milestones, parents are now marking every small achievement, whether it involves trying a new food or engaging in a novel activity. This emerging parenting trend, known as “inchstones,” has gained significant traction, being highlighted in Pinterest’s trend projections for 2024.
Pinterest stated, “In 2024, minor triumphs will hold a special place in parents’ hearts, as they infuse festivity into their children’s seemingly ordinary moments. Baby’s first tooth? Cue the cupcake. Successful potty training? Sprinkle on some extra joy.”
Nevertheless, while acknowledging these small victories can undoubtedly boost a child’s morale, the question arises: could this practice potentially detach them from reality?
India Today reached out to several experts to delve into whether parents should fully embrace the inchstone trend or exercise caution.
Understanding Inchstone Parenting
Dr. Komal Manshani, a child psychologist from Daffodils at Artemis Hospital in New Delhi, elucidates, “Inchstone parenting revolves around celebrating even the tiniest accomplishments of a child. This approach underscores the importance of recognizing and fostering progress, irrespective of its scale. It nurtures a supportive and positive environment conducive to a child’s holistic growth and development.”
“The essence of this concept aligns with established theories such as positive reinforcement and scaffolding. While inchstone parenting has gained recent popularity, it is not a novel concept and has long been acknowledged in parenting literature,” she elaborates.
Echoing this sentiment, Dr. Satish Kumar, a clinical psychologist at Manipal Hospital in Bengaluru, asserts, “In the past, parents primarily focused on major milestones, whereas younger parents are now inclined to celebrate events like half-birthdays, the loss of a first tooth, or a child independently putting on their shoes.”
The Pinnacle Parenting Trend of 2024: Why the Hype?
Dr. Manshani outlines the reasons behind the burgeoning popularity of inchstone parenting:
- The contemporary era prioritizes a child’s comprehensive development over stringent discipline.
- This parenting style resonates with young parents seeking to instill resilience and self-esteem in their children.
- The emphasis on acknowledging minor victories in inchstone parenting fosters a positive and nurturing atmosphere, reducing anxiety and pressure.
- This adaptive parenting style suits modern parents contending with diverse family structures.
Dr. Kumar further explains, “Current young parents are predominantly millennials. Their lifestyle and work-life balance emphasize a multifaceted approach to life. They comprehend the need to manage various aspects of their lives, including work, travel, relationships, and parenting. Inchstone parenting embodies an evolution in parenting styles, catering to both young parents and growing children.”
Inchstone vs. Milestone
- Inchstone parenting and milestone parenting diverge in their focal points.
- Milestone parenting revolves around achieving specific milestones within defined timelines, often leading to undue stress.
- In contrast, inchstone parenting centers on celebrating each small step and acknowledging individual progress.
- The preference for either parenting style hinges on the parents’ objectives and the child’s requirements.
- Inchstone parenting offers flexibility, while milestone parenting is suited for those aiming to establish clear benchmarks.
Kamna Chhibber, a clinical psychologist at Fortis Healthcare, emphasizes, “Both milestone and inchstone parenting are crucial, as individuals need goals to strive for while also focusing on the processes involved in achieving these goals or milestones.”
Embracing a Step-by-Step Approach
Dr. Kumar suggests that inchstone parenting empowers parents to navigate challenges gradually, alleviating pressure on their children and diminishing parental concerns.
Conversely, children receive appreciation and acceptance for their authentic selves, fostering confidence as they transition into adolescence.
Dr. Manshani concurs, stating, “This parenting style exerts a positive influence on both children and parents. By celebrating even the slightest progress, inchstone parenting cultivates a relaxed and enjoyable environment, reducing unwarranted stress and anxiety in children. It engenders a more gratifying and confident growth experience for kids.”
She believes that inchstone parenting encourages parents to revel in their children’s advancements, irrespective of magnitude, fostering heightened confidence and satisfaction among parents.
Does Excessive Celebration Foster Stronger Bonds?
The level of attachment parents develop with their children is influenced by various factors such as family size, cultural background, and individual traits.
Dr. Manshani elucidates, “Contemporary parents may exhibit heightened attachment due to smaller family sizes. However, family size is not the sole determinant of the bond between parents and children. Other contributing factors include personal experiences, cultural norms, and parental concerns.”
Nonetheless, Chhibber warns that excessive attachment can lead to intrusive behavior, heightened vigilance, and potential nagging, inducing restlessness and anxiety in parents. This could manifest in over-protectiveness and possessiveness, potentially instigating attachment issues and anxiety in children as they mature.
Learning from Setbacks
While celebrating inchstones positively impacts a child’s development, it is imperative to strike a balance between acknowledging progress and fostering resilience.
Dr. Manshani emphasizes, “In addition to celebrating achievements, children must also learn to navigate setbacks and failures. Encouraging a mindset that views failures as learning opportunities aids children in developing adaptability.”
Chhibber underscores the importance of not magnifying every minor achievement, enabling children to assimilate experiences without perceiving routine tasks as extraordinary occurrences.
Preparing for the Real World
Experts acknowledge that some young parents may grapple with preparing their children for real-world challenges, contingent upon factors such as education, socio-economic status, family dynamics, and personal experiences.
While certain parents may face hurdles due to their age and circumstances, many effectively equip their children with the requisite skills, values, and support for navigating the real world.
Inchstone Parenting: Balancing the Scales
- Inchstone parenting bolsters self-esteem by emphasizing the recognition and celebration of minor achievements.
- It motivates children by acknowledging progress, irrespective of scale.
- This style of parenting fosters positive reinforcement, creating a supportive and affirming environment.
- Inchstone parenting nurtures the parent-child bond, fostering a supportive relationship.
- However, excessive praise and celebration may inflate egos and foster a habit of setting unrealistic goals in children.
- Children may struggle to cope with setbacks and failures, potentially leading to stress and depression.
- Excessive validation could engender a fixation on external approval.
- The constant pursuit of achieving and celebrating minor milestones may impose undue pressure on children, inducing stress and anxiety.
Maintaining equilibrium is paramount to prevent children from becoming inflexible and obstinate.
“Balancing the celebration of achievements with imparting the importance of handling failures positively is crucial,” Dr. Manshani emphasizes.
Parents must exercise mindfulness to avoid excessively praising their children for every minor accomplishment. Open communication and respect for individual differences are vital to prepare children for real-world challenges effectively.
Ultimately, familiarizing children with setbacks and failures is essential to instill resilience and a positive outlook, enabling them to confront challenges with fortitude.