When I discovered I was expecting a baby girl, I was overwhelmed with a mix of emotions.
Firstly, the thought of having a daughter brought to mind the extraordinary and deep connection I shared with my own mother. I worried that I might not measure up to the level of closeness we had.
Secondly, there was the weight of responsibility in raising a strong, determined, and intelligent young woman in today’s challenging world.
The task of nurturing a girl felt significantly different from my experience with my son, Fox. I found a certain comfort in raising him, knowing that as a male, he would face fewer obstacles due to his gender, race, and physical abilities, granting him an inherent advantage in life—a realization that was both enlightening and disconcerting for a mother.
However, welcoming Ever into the world shed light on the inherent struggles faced by females, where societal expectations dictate a delicate balance between intelligence and modesty, independence and conformity, and fitness and humility.
The societal paradox in defining women’s success places us at a disadvantage, compounded by enduring issues such as the gender pay gap and the inherent risks associated with being a woman. My determination to equip Ever with street-smarts, intuition, and a keen awareness of external influences stems from this understanding.
Navigating these challenges felt daunting, prompting me to seek guidance from a therapist upon learning of my daughter’s impending arrival.
Ensuring a conscious approach to parenting both our children, with a particular focus on fostering Ever’s bond with her father and modeling a healthy family dynamic, has been paramount for Benji and me.
Recognizing the significance of a stable male role model in a girl’s life, I strive to provide Ever with that foundation, acknowledging its transformative impact—a privilege I did not have growing up.
In the absence of such a figure within the family, seeking out strong male role models becomes crucial, offering alternative sources of guidance and inspiration.
Empowering Ever with independence and assertiveness while nurturing her need to be heard and valued remains a top priority. Encouraging her to embrace her autonomy and leadership qualities equips her to thrive in a modern society that demands strength and resilience.
Exposing her to narratives featuring powerful female protagonists, such as Vicky the Vet, and showcasing women excelling in various fields, including motherhood, aims to broaden her horizons and reinforce the notion that all avenues are open to her.
Her innate independence alleviates some concerns, yet I am committed to ensuring she feels validated in expressing her emotions, even if deemed irrational at her young age—creating a supportive environment for her to navigate her feelings independently.
Understanding the critical period for shaping neural pathways between birth and age seven underscores the significance of instilling these values early on.
As we commemorate International Women’s Day in 2024, my greatest aspiration is to nurture a resilient, determined young woman capable of overcoming any obstacle that comes her way.