Although a talented child may complete a homework assignment in half the time it takes their peers, motivating them to start or finish the task can pose a challenge. This situation can result in report cards that do not reflect the child’s true abilities, leading parents to question whether their child is unmotivated or how they can spark more interest in academics.
Dr. Ellen Braaten, a psychologist and the executive director of the Learning and Emotional Assessment Program at Massachusetts General Hospital, advises parents to approach this issue with empathy. She suggests that parents observe where exactly their children struggle in the task-completion process and offer understanding as they navigate the unique challenges that come with giftedness.
“It’s crucial to pinpoint the specific obstacle that is hindering their progress,” says Braaten, author of Bright Kids Who Couldn’t Care Less: How to Rekindle Your Child’s Motivation, a resource for parents seeking to understand and motivate their gifted children. Sometimes, the lack of motivation stems from anxiety about the project or difficulties with executive functioning. Other times, it may be due to feeling overwhelmed and unsure about the task’s requirements. Once parents identify these barriers, they can help guide their children through these challenges effectively.
Bright Kids Who Couldn’t Care Less: How to Rekindle Your Child’s Motivation delves into identifying the reasons behind a child’s apparent lack of motivation and establishing realistic expectations for gifted children without causing them to disengage.
How Can Parents Assist Gifted Children in Initiating Tasks?
Various factors may impede a child’s ability to start tasks, and parents must investigate where the breakdown occurs in the process. Children may struggle with identifying the task at hand, especially when faced with open-ended projects that lack clear starting points.
Children may find it challenging to articulate the reasons behind their task aversion if asked in a broad manner. Therefore, parents should ask specific questions such as whether the child has all the necessary materials, understands the task requirements, or can describe the project or questions on a worksheet.
Building Task Persistence in Gifted Children
Persistence involves not only persevering through difficulties but also accurately assessing one’s progress. Many children become frustrated because they lose track of their progress and struggle to estimate how close they are to completion. Parents can support their children by helping them understand where they are in the process and what remains to be done.
Gifted children may feel overwhelmed and doubt their ability to complete a task due to errors, obstacles, or perceived lack of necessary skills. By assisting them in recognizing their position in the task, parents can cultivate persistence in their children.
Balancing Motivation Without Overbearing Parenting
Gifted children may lack persistence because they have not encountered many challenging experiences. When faced with a task outside their comfort zone, they may easily become frustrated and disengage. It is essential for parents to strike a balance between motivating their children and allowing them space to navigate tasks independently without excessive guidance or pressure.
Executive Functioning and Emotional Aspects in Gifted Children
In addition to task management and self-monitoring abilities, working memory plays a crucial role in a child’s executive functioning. Emotional aspects such as impulse control and emotional regulation can also impact a child’s behavior, particularly when facing frustration.
Social-Emotional Development and Empathy in Gifted Children
Encouraging giftedness to define a child’s identity can lead to social challenges, as children may struggle to understand that everyone learns differently. Building empathy and social skills is essential for gifted children to navigate social interactions successfully and develop a deeper understanding of others’ perspectives and emotions.
Adjusting Parental Approaches as Gifted Children Mature
As gifted children grow older, parents should transition from providing advice to actively listening and engaging in discussions. Older children benefit from problem-solving independently and learning from their experiences. Parents should focus on guiding their children through challenges rather than imposing solutions.
Managing Parental Expectations and Motivation in Gifted Children
Parental expectations for gifted children are often high and focused on academic achievements. However, it is crucial for parents to align their expectations with the child’s passions and strengths, avoiding unnecessary pressure and ensuring that the child’s interests drive their motivation and success.