Recently, it was my 9-year-old’s chance to bring snacks for soccer, and she was thrilled. Each child takes a turn, viewing it as a significant responsibility and an opportunity to impress their peers.
While I may not completely understand the excitement, I could see her enthusiasm as she carefully browsed the snack aisle at the store. She had two top choices in mind: Gansitos, a chocolate-dipped strawberries-and-cream sponge cake, or Sponches, pink and white marshmallows on a graham cracker base. Both options are equally delightful and indulgent. In the end, she opted for the Gansitos, a Mexican delicacy introduced to her by her abuelos, eager to share the joy with her teammates.
Naturally, not everyone on the team may share the same level of enthusiasm for the chosen treat, and that’s to be expected. However, what took me by surprise was a disparaging remark from another parent regarding my daughter’s selection.
Did the parent who quietly criticized “this trashy junk crap” (and disposed of the unopened snack) realize that I overheard? Frankly, I almost wish she had voiced her opinion directly to me so I could respond.
I remain both irritated and bemused by the incident. Thus, here is a letter encompassing all the thoughts I wish I could have conveyed to that parent and any others in similar need of perspective.
Dear Enthusiastic Soccer Mom,
Greetings. It’s me—the perpetually worn-out mom who opts for a baseball cap out of convenience rather than a desire to embody the typical “soccer mom” look.
Our children participate in the same community soccer team, which, while enjoyable, hasn’t exactly displayed World Cup-level skills. And that’s perfectly fine! I mention this because it appears that you are exceptionally passionate about their games, which is commendable. However, it’s essential to remember that these are 9-year-old children playing for fun.
On the subject of children being children, I couldn’t help but notice your disapproval of the snack my family provided this past weekend. It was rather disheartening how you dismissed both figuratively and literally the treat my child selected for the team. I understand your perspective. In an ideal scenario, my child might have opted for freshly squeezed green juice and kale chips. Instead, we found ourselves perusing the aisle filled with sweet snack cakes for 20 minutes.
Indeed, the snack was a sugary indulgence accompanied by Sunny-D, and I respect any reasons you may have had for not wanting your child to partake in it. Whether due to dietary restrictions, allergies, or concerns about sugar-induced hyperactivity, I appreciate your preferences for your child’s diet. However, I cannot condone your derogatory remarks such as “trashy junk crap” within earshot of my child.
Not only would it have deeply hurt her if she had heard you, but it also implies a moral judgment on food that is unwarranted. Food should not be assigned moral value.
While certain foods offer more nutritional benefits and different ingredients affect the body distinctively, there is no need for judgment. Instead of being critical, perhaps a more respectful approach could have been taken:
“Hey, kiddo, that looks tempting, but let’s save it for later.”
“It’s almost lunchtime, so let’s have a proper meal before indulging in this treat.”
“Thank you, but we’ll pass for now.”
Ultimately, I am indifferent to whether you allow your child to enjoy a Gansito, but I do take issue with snap judgments on a simple snack.
Perhaps one day your child will grace the U.S. Olympic team, but for now, let’s allow the children to be just that—children who can relish a single soccer snack without it altering their life’s course.
If you struggle to permit a non-organic treat, please reserve your comments for the privacy of your car, much like the rest of us.
Warm regards,
The soccer mom who can finally release the frustration of snack criticism now that it’s been expressed.
Holly Garcia is a writer covering topics on parenting, mental health, and lifestyle. Residing in the Midwest, she navigates raising her daughters while fueling herself with copious amounts of coffee.